Oh, and I have decided to start hating God again. Prayers, gah, yeah, sure, I feel better after the test, but when the goddamn test come back.... ARG... damnit, this was why I had stopped praying years ago. 'cause it did nothing but shit.
Hah, my mind seeks ways to give God some excuses. It needs to learn to shut up. God is either a friggin moron or a sadistic bastard. Or he's dead.
I should really post this @ ibneko.servehttp.com. no one here need to read this, not at all. Maybe I should set it to friends only, or something vaguely similar. Private? hah, then what's the point of posting? Nah, it'll be public but lacking the comment option. I don't think I want pity now. ::shrugs:: Feel free to talk to me online, if you can hunt me down on AIM. But there's really no need to, go screw yourself (or if you're underage, go umm... watch Grave of the Fireflies).
i pointlessly pour out my soul in vain attempts to soothe the agony of hurt...
...the thing i have never done beckons darkly as voices around and within me shout out warnings of "NO!"...
...fallback checks, just one last one, lonely like the bird that lost it's mate... 1... to keep the end from starting.
at hours like this, i hate myself