Benjamin Juang (ibneko) wrote,
Benjamin Juang



Cherry picking some points to discuss:
Confidence is bred from privilege and security, two things which women lack - in both cases, sadly, due to men. It’s difficult for men to understand a woman’s perspective on threatening language or behaviour, on lewd remarks, or even on the prospect of walking home alone, along a dark street. The world is actually two radically different places, yet we see only one.

It's true. I had observed once that I can't see/comprehend why women are afraid of walking home alone along a dark street. Well, no, it's not that I can't comprehend - I know the logical reasons and rationale behind it, but, as a guy, I'm blind to feelings and emotions of the root causes; I have been mostly unable to empathize, despite wanting to. (I think I noted this once, but totally did a terrible job wording it and was completely misunderstood. Everyone probably thought I was an asshole.)

Our society still inflicts a thousand paper-cuts on a woman’s confidence. Unnecessarily gender-specific, gender-illuminating or gender-characterising remarks. Social assumptions about who is paying the bill, or who is to be spoken to as an authority figure, or (more subtly) whose ego is to be primarily accommodated during an interaction.

Saddest of all, we see the horror of social conditioning on women themselves; female misogyny.

For goodness’ sake, woman!
Stupid woman.
Ugh. I hate offices full of women.
I bet the driver is a woman.
Women need to learn some responsibility.

It's interesting. Aside from "I bet the driver is a woman." (because this I've observed - at least 2 of the 3 drivers that annoy me on the road turn out to be women - usually moms with kids or talking on their phones. The rest of the time, it's old folk. Or periodically, a guy in a suit on the phone.), I don't think I've ever actually said this things. I think this is probably due to having mostly female friends through middle and high school (as part of the humanities gifted and talented programs / International Baccalaureate programs). Smart female friends, who were generally a good deal sharper than I was.
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